Monday, October 31, 2011

All the news that's fit to tell

Things have been swirling around my life lately and, unfortunately, I haven't had an opportunity to sit down and tell you all about them.  So much to tell with so little time to do the telling.

I'll start with my job.  Whew!  It has been BUSY.  You may remember back on August 28th we had a hurricane down in my neck of the woods.  This particular hurricane brought A LOT of rain with it.  There wasn't a lot of damage here at the college where I work, but there was a lot of moisture.  A week after the hurricane we had A LOT of rain.  A LOT.  Along with the rain we had very humid conditions.  Frankly, the weather was crummy.  At this time I was in Reno, NV enjoying myself at the Tailhook convention and worrying about the patch in my roof leaking.  Here at the college, however, a different creature was taking hold in two of our residence halls.  MOLD.  And a lot of it.  Oh no???!!!! What will we do?  The first thing we did was move 350 kids out of their dorm rooms and set them up in hotels around this county and in one county over.  This is not exactly the "college experience" these kids were looking for, or for that matter, the experience their parents had paid for.  So, I spent a week handling crappy parent phone calls.  Exhausting.  Then, one alum came up with an idea.  His idea was this.  Why not float a cruise ship up to the college and let the kids live on it?  Brilliant.  So, the following week we began to jump through all the hoops involved to get a cruise ship docked near the college.  Fyi, there are a lot of hoops.  Oh, and btw, the folks that tell you the news found this a FASCINATING story.  There have been press all over the place.  My boss is the point man for most of the talking and showing of all stuff mold and cruise ship.  Needless to say, the phone is ringing off the hook.  After the press gets a hold of the story, guess what?  Sales people for every sort of mold remediation, air purification, cleaning, painting, you name it, have called and called and called.  Imagine 75-100 telemarketers calling you for five days in a row.  Exhausting.  There is a press conference going on right now and I hear the ship tooting it's horn and helicopters flying overhead taking pictures.  Wonderful.

So, I was tired.  In the midst of my tirednessness an opportunity presented itself.  My husband was invited to play in a FREE blackjack tournament in Atlantic City.  He didn't think he wanted to go.  He thought he should stay home and work on our tree debris and other repair projects we have to do.  But, I told him, it's going to RAIN all day Saturday.  Yippee!!!  Rain.  Let's go to AC.  He didn't win $35,000 at the black jack tournament, this time, but we did have a wonderful time.  I relaxed.  I napped.  I put a few items on eBay.  Wonderful.

Which leads me to tell you what has been going on with eBay.  Or, more to the point, PayPal.  It seems the government didn't feel it was getting its fair share of tax from my eBay sales.  So now, if you sell more than 200 items and make $20,000 you have to file a Form-1099 and pay income tax on your eBay sales.  This is new for 2011 and it's just another way Obama has his hand in my pocket to give out money to people who don't want to pay their own bills.  Btw, I'm selling stuff I've found in my closet.  I've already paid tax on these items.  Give me a break.  However, there is a bright side to this story.  My son has an eBay account and PayPal account.  I asked him if he would mind if I used his account to sell my stuff.  He balked, at first, but relented.  He knows I love eBaying and he showed his love for me by sharing his account.  Wonderful.

While we were in AC, or rather, immediately after we arrived in AC my son called to tell me he got in a car accident.  CRAP.  Poor guy, he's ok, his car is a total loss.  He had JUST gotten it back from being repaired from having a tree fall on it during hurricane Irene.  I think he had had it back for one week.  NUTS.  It was drizzling, he was driving a bit too fast for the conditions, the car in front of him stopped short, he hit his breaks, slid off the road and hit a telephone pole.  Well, when you hit a telephone pole there are two things you know for sure.  One thing, it's your fault.  Telephone poles don't jump out in front of your car.  You're going to get a ticket.  Second thing, your car is going to get wrecked.  Telephone poles aren't going anywhere.  They stay put and your car bends and breaks.  Oh yeah, and the air bags deploy (add $1000).  So now his car is gone.  Things haven't exactly been going his way.  On the up side, I didn't get angry or yell.  I asked him if he was ok and patiently waited for my husband to return from his massage to tell him the news.  Wonderful.

I think this just about catches everyone up on my wonderful life.  I'm staying positive.  I'm employed, albeit working a bit too hard just now, I'm back on eBay and LOVING it, and my son is OK and he's lucky.  His grandma had given him her car when she passed away.  :)


Wednesday, October 26, 2011

November

A swirl of steam wraps 'round
Cinnamon apple caramel cream
Dreams of leaf beds concealing me
Heaps of sweets say November's near

Leaves off trees whip 'round and 'round
Greens fade 'way to orange and sound
Golden brown crunch covers ground
Smokey smells seep through weeds

Snuggling in socks and sweaters now
Bid farewell to summer play
Resign ourselves to shorter days
Songs of Christmas say November's near

Tuesday, October 25, 2011

Maybe there is a "do over" in parenting

Yesterday I wrote a post about there NOT being a "do over" in parenting.  I'm not a Mommy Blogger, but I am a mom.  After I posted this I started thinking about it.  A lot. 

Yesterday's post kinda made me look like I was/am a bad mom.  I'm not a bad mom.  I don't think any parent is a perfect parent.  I made mistakes in my parenting and I shared those with you guys.  I just wanted to put a little experience, hope and strength out there in the blogosphere.  I'm trying very hard to be the encouraging and inspiring parent we all want to be.  And, I want my kid to move out of my house and live life on his own terms,... soon.

This led me to this thought.  Hey, maybe I will get my "do over."  How, you may ask? 

Maybe I'll be a grandma some day.

My mom and her great grandson

Monday, October 24, 2011

You don't get a "do over" in parenting

I've mentioned before I don't have a very close relationship with my son.  We struggle.  I don't praise him enough and I don't feel he respects me enough.  My husband gets so angry with me and often corrects me in the way I talk to my son.  He reminds me to Be Positive.  Point out my son's successes and minimize the failures.  Don't use a Tone in my voice.  Don't Yell.

I wish I could have a "do over" in parenting my son.  In my old age Now that I have more life experience, there are things I wish I would have done and things I wish I had not done.

1.  I wouldn't have felt responsible every act, good or bad, my child performed.  I certainly wouldn't have berated myself as a bad parent for every poor grade or bad attitude my child exhibited.
  
2.  I would have found more opportunities to take a break from parenting and gone on weekends with my husband.  We lived so far from family it was not possible to ask them to watch our son so we could get away for more than a dinner or a movie.  I wish I had had the courage to ask a friend to watch our son for a weekend every now and again.  It would have been a nice break from parenting and reconnection with my husband.

3.  I wish I would have punished less.  And I certainly wish I hadn't hit him.  Yeah, I called it spanking, but I hit him.  And, I hit him while I was angry.  Super angry.  Yeah, I wish I could take that back. 

4.  I would have picked my battles better.  Lucky me, since my son still lives with us, I can work on this.  Not every issue is worth a battle.  Spilled milk, no issue.  Muddy shoes on the carpet, who cares.  Wearing the same underwear for a week, so what.  Bad grades, this one would be tough, but what the heck.

5.  I would keep in mind that, this too shall pass.  My son is going to grow up, some day.  He's going to move out of the house, some day.  And he WILL be a responsible adult, some day.  This is still one I get to work on since my son is still at home and hasn't done any of the previous things yet.  But he will.  Some day.

6.  I wish I would have treasured his childhood more.  I now know how quickly childhood goes by.  Time flies.  You can't catch it and you can't get it back.  I wish I would have taken more pictures.  

7.  I would've remembered how special my son is.  I wouldn't have wished him to be like any other child.  I wish I would have focused more on what he IS, than on what I wished him to be.  This, too, is something I can do now.  Wow, I'm super lucky my son still lives at home and hasn't moved out on his own.  I DO get an opportunity to continue parenting him, but I'll call it "consulting."  I am SUPER lucky.  (btw, I tried Super Hard to take the sarcasm out of my Tone)

8.  I wish someone would have reminded me you don't get "do-overs" in parenting and give me something like this post to read.  I needed to be reminded I don't always have to be the "bad guy."  I needed to be reminded to say Yes more often.  I needed to be reminded to BE PRESENT more often in my child's life.

9.  I would have remembered how short life is.  Life is short.  Life goes by fast.  When I was 30 I felt I had all the time in the world.  Now that I'm in my 50's I see how fast this life is zipping by.

10.  I wish I would have known how far hugs and cookies go to make a child feel loved and special.  I see now that you cannot get or give too many hugs.  And cookies, well there can never be too many cookies.

Friday, October 21, 2011

I have a new roof!

I am so happy.  You just cannot imagine the happiness I feel.  A roof.  A roof over my head.  A secure roof with no broken trusses or holes.  I am smiling from ear to ear.  I know this sounds silly to say one can get so excited over a roof, but it's true.  I am thrilled.  This is the first step in the restoration of my home.  My sanctuary.  My nest.  The roof is so pretty.  It sounds funny to say it is pretty, but it is a pretty roof.

A short list of chores still to come:
  • Drywall - the drywall guy came today and gave me an estimate.  It was higher than the insurance adjuster figured, but we will see if we can get her to change her mind.  :)
  • Paint 
  • Clean carpet - when we have the carpeting cleaned, we will know immediately if we need to replace it.  If there is a strong smell of mold, the carpeting goes.  *between you and me, I think there is going to be mold.  I've seen the evidence, but I'll play by the insurance rules.*
  • Deck replacement - fingers crossed, this will start next week.
  • Window replacement - just ordered the window yesterday.  It will take six weeks to come in.
  • Remove all trees leaning AWAY from the house - I have no idea when we will start on this.
  • Remove trees in back yard - these trees fell into our back yard, but these were trees growing on common (*read, community center property)  We will have to deal with the HOA on this.  (Oh, I'm on the board of the HOA.  It will be interesting to see how this goes.)
  • Have a Merry Christmas?  I hope so.  :)
My pretty new roof