It's not me, it's YOU

I've read a lot of blogs, books, articles and face book comments reminding me that "it's not you, it's ME."  I'm to take responsibility for the way I feel or react to words or actions of those people who interact with me, whether it is face to face or in writing.  Or, they say, my reaction to a person's actions or words are all about how I'm feeling or the state of emotion I happen to find myself in at the time.  Sure, I need to take responsibility for myself.  I'm a grown-up.  I know people can't make me FEEL anything I don't want to feel.  I know others can't make me DO anything I don't want to do.  But, come on, we all know there are hurtful, mean spirited people out there.  Hopefully they are few and far in between.  However, social networking, including face book, blogging, etc. has given some folks UNBELIEVABLE GALL.  I'll bet the same folks that slam you on fb or write scathing comments on your blog, wouldn't have the nerve to say any of it to your face.  I'm wondering if these same people would have then nerve to pick up the phone and say any of the same things over the phone?  I doubt it.  And, of course, there is always the possibility of drunk commenting.  It could happen.  (drinking and blogging is not a good combo)  It's funny, to me, that some bloggers out there think they should be protected from the pointed or disagreeing comments.  As a blogger, I know I'm putting myself out there.  I allow anonymous commenting.  I can take it.

I'm of the mind, it's not me, it's YOU.  I'm not responsible for your feelings about my blog or my face book status or my comment or, even, your displeasure with the way I live my life.  I'm responsible for being respectful of my readers, co-workers, friends, family and the human race, in general.  I don't have to agree with you.  I don't have to like you.  I don't have to tolerate you.  I do, however, need to treat you with respect and civility.  I'm glad to have the freedom and opportunity to share my feelings on different subjects on a blog and I feel fortunate to receive comments from encouraging and caring readers.  I think I would appreciate a dissenting comment.  I think a comment disagreeing with a point of view I hold would give me the opportunity to ponder another side of an issue.  My blogging intentions are not to teach anyone anything.  My intentions are to learn more about myself and focus on the positive.  I haven't had any issues, so don't worry about me.  I was thinking about how easily some folks get their noses pushed out of joint about comments on blogs or fb.  I guess I feel a little sorry for them.  Maybe they are young and immature?  Maybe they haven't had much life experience and have been sheltered in the life they live?  Maybe they just have very thin skin?

So, there you have it.  It's not me, it's you.