Wednesday, October 17, 2012

Why I despise a liar

"Watching the debate tonight will be like watching a televised meeting of the Pathological Liars Club."

"The second episode of "Half Truths, Lies and Damn Lies" tonight! Must see TV."

These are both facebook statuses from ministers to their flocks.  Maybe this is why we've moved lying from the SIN category to the IT'S OK category.

There is something about being lied to that hurts in a way that pales to the pain of a punch in the nose or a slap in the face.  It takes so much longer to recover from being lied to.  

Consider the respect given to the office of the president of the United States.  The statements from those ministers would not have been uttered, let alone, written down prior to the Watergate scandal and the resignation of Richard Nixon.  You would think we, as a nation, would have learned one thing from that whole affair.  The one thing we should have learned was that committing the crime is one thing.  Lying about it after you are caught only makes it worse.  But we didn't learn, did we?  Enter Bill Clinton and his sex scandal with an intern and the "I did not have sexual relations with that woman, ..." finger wagging admonition on national television which resulted in his impeachment.  Watching the downfall of two powerful men as a result of their lies should teach each and every one of us a lesson.  But it doesn't.

I'm thinking this must be some sort of mental disorder.  I can tell when I'm being lied to.  Don't misunderstand me, it's not because I think everybody lies.  (actually, I do think this, but that isn't what I mean here)  I like to give people the benefit of the doubt.  When someone tells me something about themselves, I usually believe them.  That is, until it doesn't make sense anymore.  Let's face it, most liars think they are smarter than the people they are lying to.  There is some sort of superiority complex going on in their minds.  I don't completely understand the psychology involved.  

I know, from personal experience, that many people tell a lie to avoid the consequences of their actions.  I know when I was a child I did this.  At some point in my childhood I discovered that the consequences of my actions PLUS the consequences of being caught in the lie made my life more miserable.  I learned if I was going to do the crime, I was going to have to pay the price.  Thank goodness for the Holy Spirit living in me and reminding me of right and wrong.  (or a strong moral compass for you unbelieving readers)  Evidently not every child learns this lesson.  Recently I was lied to by my son.  He told us he was taking a college class over the summer, when in fact, he was not.  My husband and I knew he was lying to us.  We gave him opportunity after opportunity to tell us the truth.  (my husband said I gave him opportunity after opportunity to lie to me)  Finally at the end of August he confessed.  We were furious, but not surprised.  How could he think we were so stupid we didn't know or wouldn't find out?  He lives with us, for Pete's sake.  I have an extremely difficult time believing anything he tells me.  He's offended by this, but that's just the way it is.

I don't understand how an adult (is 32 years old considered an adult or is it still a part of the extended adolescence?) can tell everyone a lie about her family and her house for six months.  It was a stupid lie and doesn't matter to anyone.  Just because she didn't understand how a short sale works, I guess she thought no one else understood how a short sale works, either.  This seems to be part of the superiority complex that goes along with lying.  And, it is far from the first time she has lied to family and friends, gotten caught, confessed, and then lied again.  She is a self-confessed liar.  I get that.  When people tell you who they are, believe them.  Yet, she is comforted and forgiven for lying to her friends, ...again.  I wonder how long the long-suffering of her friends will last?  Maybe she is what is known as a pathological liar?  Maybe she just hasn't grown up yet?  Maybe the consequences of her actions haven't hurt enough?  I don't know.

Our tenants have lied to us, continuously.  And they know we know they are lying.  They just keep doing it.  Don't liars know that when you lie to a person it is so disrespectful?  The minute they begin to speak we know a lie will come out.  The minute they begin to speak we dislike them more.  It's like they think we are stupid or something.  Or maybe, it's just their nature.  

Then again, maybe we are becoming a nation that has been told so long to be tolerant of everybody that we've begun to tolerate bad behavior and call it a disorder or something.  This is kind of frightening.  We are a nation that tolerates killing the unborn.  We are becoming a nation that tolerates lying.  Where will this downward spiral end?  What are we becoming? 

Colossians 3:9-10:  Do not lie to each other, since you have taken off your old self with its practices and have put on the new self, which is being renewed in knowledge in the image of its Creator.

Proverbs 12:22:  The Lord detests lying lips, but he delights in people who are trustworthy.

619.  My readers.  Thanks for missing me and letting me know you miss me and are concerned.
620.  Time to myself.
621.  People telling the truth.  I just love those people.
622.  Ministers that are not snarky.  I'm getting so sick of that type.
623.  Vodka.  (I cannot wait until this election is over)


  1. ha i was telling my government class that  i wish they real time fact checked the debates and had pop ups on the tv that would show the truth behind what each of them said...i think that it is a trait our leaders on both sides of the carpet have adopted well...

  2. Yay!  You're back!  Lying, hate it.  I try to tell those close to me how honest confession of failure is way easier for me to deal with than hiddenness and deception.
    And about politics, I think failure to respect authority has degenerated in every realm, starting in the home.  No wonder we don't respect our governmental leaders.  Of course, good old fashioned integrity in our leaders might help the situation as well.

  3. You are right - lying is never good.  

  4. I keep thinking he cannot be lying so much..maybe he just wants to believe what he says so much and buried that inner voice of conscience so deep that he really does believe what he is saying.

  5. I agree with all this.  Lying is so accepted now.  No one wants to take responsibility for their actions.  It's a spiritual flaw of the human heart.  Only God is truth.  The closer we get to God, the better we are, b/c his standard makes more of an impression on our lives. 

  6. Thanks for missing me, and telling me you miss me.  Those words were like a warm hug.  It's funny, the same people that are so quick to call the candidates liars are the same people that sit in the bible study and tell us they've been lying to us.  I guess it takes one to know one.

  7. Sadly, I see this spiraling lower and lower as time goes by.  If anyone ever wonders why the US does not seem to be a player in the end-times story in the book or Revelations, this election year should start clearing that up for them.

  8. I son't understand the lies either. But it seems a lot of people have no compunction about it. Perhaps they lie out of fear of reprisal. It seems to be an epidemic in our society.


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