Things are changing around me. I know life is constantly changing. Nothing stays the same. You cannot step into the same river twice. "Change brings opportunity." "We all have big changes in our lives that are more or less a second chance." "If we don't change, we don't grow. If we don't grow, we aren't really living." "It's the most unhappy people who fear change." "Just when I think I have learned to live life, it changes." "Change is inevitable - except from a vending machine."
Thank you, old Native American, Nido Qubein, Harrison Ford, Gail Sheehy, Mignon McLaughlin, Hugh Prathner, and Robert C. Gallagher, for words of wisdom on change.
I especially enjoyed the one reminding me "It is the most unhappy people who fear change." Wow. Thanks for that! I admit it. I'm a bit scared of the changes happening in my life right now. Remember me, I'm the girl who likes a plan. Let me tell you, the plan has all gone to hell. I know, I know...Mentsch tracht, Gott lacht (man plans, God laughs). I trust God. I know God has the real plan for my life. Today, everything seems just out of my grasp. I can't put my fingers on the changes going on around me. I'm not in control. I've always known I'm not in control, but sometimes it feels like you have some control and then you start to believe you are in control and this is what has, kinda, happened to me in a lot of parts of my life.
This is over for me. I have no control. My son, although still living at home, is taking a class. In the past, this has not worked well for him, but he's giving it another try. I have to trust he will put forth effort this time. Trust. My husband is making decisions for his future. These plans include me, but he's in control of when he decides to do whatever it is he decides to do, not me. There will be change. It is inevitable. I need to trust my husband to do the right thing. I need to trust my son to do the right thing.
What is the Right Thing? I'll tell you what I think the right thing is. The right thing is what I want them to do. However, and this is hard to type, the right thing may NOT be the thing I want them to do. This is a scary thought. This is where trust comes in. I may think the right thing for my son is to work hard in his class and get an A. I'm encouraging him to go to class and do the work, but I can't do it for him. I wish I could, but I can't. I may think the right thing for my husband to do is to stay right where he is in his employment. Tough it out. However, my husband's plan for his future may be the best thing. I have to trust his good sense and knowledge of himself and the love he has for his family and keeping us secure. Trust.
Finally, I need to trust I am in God's will and in the middle of his plan. Yep, I said finally. Why this comes to me at last instead of first is part of my problem. For some reason, I have the idea that I am NOT in the middle of God's plan if I'm not in complete obedience to God. Well, I'm not completely obedient. I haven't been to church the past two Sundays. I don't read my bible every day. I don't confess my sins every day. I cuss. I break almost all the Commandments. I know God's love for me is big, but so are consequences of disobedience. I'm consequence phobic. I don't mind doing the crime, but I don't want to do the time. (Baretta, old tv show) Here's the other problem I have with trusting God's plan. Sometimes God's plan isn't even CLOSE to what I would like. Sometimes it's 180 degrees out. This scares me, too. Trust.
There is no way around trust. I have to trust people other than myself. I have to trust my husband. I have to trust my son. I have to trust God. I guess I'm lucky, even though I don't feel lucky just now. All the people I am being put in the position to trust, love me. They all love me a LOT. And, I love them. Now all I have to do is act like I love them and show them I trust them.
I trust you to make the best decision for our family, honey.
I trust you to do well and make an effort, sweetie.
I trust you, God. I really do.
Thank you, old Native American, Nido Qubein, Harrison Ford, Gail Sheehy, Mignon McLaughlin, Hugh Prathner, and Robert C. Gallagher, for words of wisdom on change.
I especially enjoyed the one reminding me "It is the most unhappy people who fear change." Wow. Thanks for that! I admit it. I'm a bit scared of the changes happening in my life right now. Remember me, I'm the girl who likes a plan. Let me tell you, the plan has all gone to hell. I know, I know...Mentsch tracht, Gott lacht (man plans, God laughs). I trust God. I know God has the real plan for my life. Today, everything seems just out of my grasp. I can't put my fingers on the changes going on around me. I'm not in control. I've always known I'm not in control, but sometimes it feels like you have some control and then you start to believe you are in control and this is what has, kinda, happened to me in a lot of parts of my life.
This is over for me. I have no control. My son, although still living at home, is taking a class. In the past, this has not worked well for him, but he's giving it another try. I have to trust he will put forth effort this time. Trust. My husband is making decisions for his future. These plans include me, but he's in control of when he decides to do whatever it is he decides to do, not me. There will be change. It is inevitable. I need to trust my husband to do the right thing. I need to trust my son to do the right thing.
What is the Right Thing? I'll tell you what I think the right thing is. The right thing is what I want them to do. However, and this is hard to type, the right thing may NOT be the thing I want them to do. This is a scary thought. This is where trust comes in. I may think the right thing for my son is to work hard in his class and get an A. I'm encouraging him to go to class and do the work, but I can't do it for him. I wish I could, but I can't. I may think the right thing for my husband to do is to stay right where he is in his employment. Tough it out. However, my husband's plan for his future may be the best thing. I have to trust his good sense and knowledge of himself and the love he has for his family and keeping us secure. Trust.
Finally, I need to trust I am in God's will and in the middle of his plan. Yep, I said finally. Why this comes to me at last instead of first is part of my problem. For some reason, I have the idea that I am NOT in the middle of God's plan if I'm not in complete obedience to God. Well, I'm not completely obedient. I haven't been to church the past two Sundays. I don't read my bible every day. I don't confess my sins every day. I cuss. I break almost all the Commandments. I know God's love for me is big, but so are consequences of disobedience. I'm consequence phobic. I don't mind doing the crime, but I don't want to do the time. (Baretta, old tv show) Here's the other problem I have with trusting God's plan. Sometimes God's plan isn't even CLOSE to what I would like. Sometimes it's 180 degrees out. This scares me, too. Trust.
There is no way around trust. I have to trust people other than myself. I have to trust my husband. I have to trust my son. I have to trust God. I guess I'm lucky, even though I don't feel lucky just now. All the people I am being put in the position to trust, love me. They all love me a LOT. And, I love them. Now all I have to do is act like I love them and show them I trust them.
I trust you to make the best decision for our family, honey.
I trust you to do well and make an effort, sweetie.
I trust you, God. I really do.
