Tuesday, November 1, 2011

Fingers crossed

I am so hopeful just now.  I have those little flutters of butterfly wings in my tummy.  I have the excited feeling one gets when they think they may have met, "the one."  What or who, may you ask, has aroused these feelings inside of me?  I'll tell you.  It's Jesus.  And, even more to the point, a small group of people who love Jesus.

It has been a long long long time since I've been in a small group loving Jesus and desiring to know him better and to follow his teachings.  It's been a long long long time since I've been with a group of people believing the Bible is the inerrant and inspired word of the living God and not just a book we get to choose the parts we like and leave what we don't like.  Then accuse me of being intolerant if I don't agree with them.

It's been a long time since I prayed with another believer.  I've been praying on my own.  I bow my head and close my eyes and send my thoughts, my fears, my wants, my sins... heavenward.  It's been a long time since I've agreed in prayer with another believer.  Agreed, ...out loud, ...side by side.  (we didn't hold hands, but I'll bet we will one day)  This was an experience I hadn't realized I had been missing so much.  Oh, God is good and he will always leave a remnant.  Even here on the mid-Atlantic coast.  :)

I'm not sure the small group of believers allowing me to join them felt the same flutterings I was feelings, but they smiled at me.  They engaged with me.  And, there was not one sign of jaw dropping at any of my comments or contributions.  One guy asked me why I believe what I believe, but they weren't appalled or shocked and horrified by my beliefs.  We will see how the relationship grows.  The one fellow who, self admittedly, said he thought he had been tough on me, asked me if I planned to return next Monday.  I said I would and he said he was glad.  This gives me hope.  I hope I have found a group of believers willing to join Jesus in wooing me back to his side.  It's what I hope for.  It's what I asked for.

An interesting thing about this group of believers.  It is mostly made up of men.  There were five men and one woman.  She was SUPER happy to see me.  I wonder what this says about me?  I hope it doesn't mean I'm weird or anything.  I hope it doesn't mean I don't play nice with other women, 'cause I don't think this is true about me.  We will see.  I have hope.  Btw, there has been one prayer I've been praying for a very long time.  The prayer is this; "Please God, please send a godly man to walk alongside my son.  Please send an encourager to my son.  We are his parents, but I would love to have another man of God come to my son's side and be an example to him." 

I'm just wondering, is this God's answer to my prayer?  Fingers crossed.

6 comments:

  1. nice...i hope it is..we had an amazing small group when we lived in MD...we have been in those that were no good as well....i hope this one is just what you are looking for...

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  2. That's a lovely feeling, isn't it?  I am happy for you that you have found this group.  I have a tight group of friends I met at church and it was so wonderful to look up and see them at my father's funeral visitation(two years ago) and another group of them at the funeral the next day.  And it was two days before Christmas and they had to drive 100 miles to get there.  It's not exactly the same kind of group you are describing, but it has grown over the last 10 years into something that is like having a church family.

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  3.  It is a lovely feeling.  I haven't felt this type of acceptance in a long time.  I pray it continues.  I'd love to be part of a fellowship of believers again.  :)
    I'm so sorry you have lost your father.  I'm glad you had your Church people with you.  We are the ones who share the Hope of Jesus.  :)

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  4. Oh friend I am so happy for you!!  I know what it's like to be deeply connected to brothers and sisters in Christ in a very open and healthy way.  I also know what it's like to be surface connected to a bunch of Christian snobs who just want to socialize. I know what it's like to be isolated from my brothers and sisters in Christ and to be one.  I so prefer the unity part and I am happy for you!  :o)

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  5. Thank you so much for your comment, Amber.   I feel it's taken me a year or MORE to recover from the last small group of church ladies. 

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  6. That's awesome!

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