Thursday, December 13, 2012

Am I helping Girl-11 Family#1 or am I hurting her?

Tuesday I posted about the joy I feel about being able to be a part of bringing Christmas to a family that might not have been able to enjoy a traditional Christmas because of financial hardships.  I am happy about being blessed with enough finances and enough willingness to self-sacrifice and use our financial blessings wisely to be able to share these blessings with others.  It's true, there is real joy in giving.

Today I was looking at the list for the 11-year-old girl I'm giving gifts this year.  She made a list of what she wanted.  This year I don't have to ask my blog readers what the gifts listed are.  She wants clothes and a teacher Barbie.  I can figure this out.  There is a note on my list to tag the items Girl-11 Family#1.  Family#1 is the mom and dad and four children our small group is supporting for Christmas this year.  I will not know Girl-11's name.  She won't get to know my name either, because the school has asked us not to reveal this information.  So, there will be gifts to Girl-11 from "your friend."  This is so impersonal.  This breaks my heart at the same time it brings me joy.

I wish I could go over to Girl-11's house after work today.  I wish I could take her shopping today for Boy-7 Family#1's Christmas gifts.  I wish we could pick out ornaments for her to hang on the tree that will be at her house soon.  I wish we could choose a gift for mom Family#1 and dad Family#1 from Girl-11 Family#1.  Wouldn't that be fun!

What will Girl-11 Family#1 think about her Christmas this year?  What will she think about "her friend?"  Will she wonder who I am?  What about Family#1?  Will they think about the people sharing there blessings with them?  Or, will they think we are just rich people trying not to feel too guilty about our wealth at this "giving" time of year?

I have posted a few times questioning those people who consider themselves poor or whether they are just feeling entitled and are lazy.  I'm not judging Family#1.  I just wonder if I'm helping them or I'm hurting them.  It seems to me that Christian charity shouldn't be anonymous.  It seems to me that Christian charity should have a face and a smile and a hand on someone's shoulder.

I guess I can understand the anonymity the Public School feels is important to protect.  After all, they don't know me from Adam.  It's a shame we are losing community with our neighbors and there is so much distrust, even in a small town.  I'm praying over the gifts I purchase for Girl-11 Family#1 today.  I'm praying that somehow she knows they are from someone who cares and isn't rich, but just wants to share some of the blessings God has given to her.

734.  Christmas shopping for a little girl
735.  Office holiday party (this gratitude is marginal, at best, but I'm putting a smile on my face)
736.  Pandora Christmas stations
737.  Luke 2:1-20
738.  The opportunity to serve Family#1
739.  The color red
740.  Surprise cookie treats from the office supply guy
741.  The movie Elf
742.  Counting the days to a nice long break from work (we get a week and a half off!)
743.  Snuggling under the comforter on chilly mornings
744.  Having a fire in the fireplace ('cause having it in the kitchen would be dangerous)
745.  Seeing nativity sets in people's front yards

I'm sharing (again) with Emily at Imperfect Prose on Thursday's


  1. Bless you, and your heart for giving. I'm glad we were neighbors at Imperfect Prose. I think you should pray over the gifts and let God do His perfect work. Trust that the part you are playing is enough.
    Peace, good, and blessings of the season to you and yours.

  2. SouthernGalThoughtsDecember 13, 2012 at 2:00 PM

    Yes, praying for them as you purchase the gifts is the best present of all.

  3. i think it would be great if you got a chance to meet them...we often help single moms out and will go to their place to give them the presents...albeit at times when the child is not home so they can give it as a gift from them if they would like...

  4. oh girl i LOVE your heart. 

  5. She's already received the best present of all. Your heart. Many thanks for this post.

    Greetings from London.

  6. what a wonderful post, blog, ATTITUDE!

    Weekend Aloha from HonoluluComfort Spiral                               ~  > <  }  }  ( ° >                                                > <  }  }  ( ° >

  7. the priest said just give.  give when someone asks.   I try and take that advise, and do not question anymore.

  8. I agree.  How can she get the full extent of receiving a sacrifice from another if she doesn't experience the emotion and connection with the person giving?  I absolutely understand the quandary about am I helping or hurting.  I have those same kinds of thoughts.  God knows it all and He deals with the lazy and irresponsible.  We continue to bless and give no matter the circumstance.


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