"I wish my husband didn't have to go to work. EVER"

I recently saw a fb status saying "I wish my husband didn't have to go to work.  EVER."  The posting of this status was quickly followed by dozens of likes and dozens of comments stating how much these commenting wives wanted their husbands home with them all day.  How they LOVE to be together.  How they NEED to talk to them and be with them.  <3

After a few minutes of laughing out loud, I took a breath and thought about the feelings and thoughts behind these "likes" and comments. 

Did these women really want their husband home with them so they could spend all day together, doing things together?  Or, was it the desire for their husband to be home and to do their work FOR them?  These posting, liking, commenting women were all stay at home moms with small children.  These are women who had made a conscience choice to quit their jobs and stay home with their children.  Don't get me wrong, I think being a SAHM is a wonderful thing to do.  If your family can afford to do it or if you can adjust to living within the means of a one income family, I think it is the best thing you can do for your family.  I also think, having made this decision, being a SAHM is a job.  Part of the job is being the support the working spouse needs to continue to go back into the working world day after day.  It doesn't mean your spouse works for you.  What happened to the Proverbs 31 woman?

I know my mom thought I had it easy while I was home with my child.  And, I did.  I had a washer and dryer in my house.  I had a dishwasher and a microwave oven.  I had a VHS with as many Disney tapes as any child could view.  I could afford to call long distance to my mom whenever I needed her.  Compared to the 1950's and 1960's when my mother was home with my brothers and me, you bet I had it easier.

Now I'm looking at these women posting their status on facebook and having their status liked and commented on within a split second of posting.  Are they on facebook ALL THE TIME?  It makes me wonder.  Where is the time spent playing with children?  Where is the time spent reading to children?  Cooking for them?  Oh, and pouring a can of soup over rice isn't really cooking.  Washing their clothes?  Cleaning up after them?  How do they have time to be on facebook so much?  Btw, the status poster also commented that she and her husband emailed and called each other many times during the work day.  So,it seems, neither of them are putting in a full day of work.     

I saw a magnet on my mom's refrigerator.  It said "Retirement, twice the husband, half the money."

This ^ is my future.  I'm not saying I'm not looking forward to being retired.  'cause I am.  I'm not saying I'm not looking forward to being with my husband ALL DAY.  'cause I am.  I guess I'm saying, I may end up being on facebook a lot more.  ;)
 

   

Participating in Advent

Advent is the liturgical period preceding Christmas, beginning on the fourth Sunday before Christmas.  The focus is the coming of Jesus at the Incarnation and observed by many Christians as a season of prayer, fasting and penitence.

Participating in Advent is a wonderful way to put the focus on what Christmas really is all about.  Jesus was born to be a savior to the world.  God come to earth, incarnate.  Emmanuel.

I've never really focused on Advent in a personal way.  Sure, I've seen the church pick a family to come up to the front during Sunday service and light a candle on the wreath and read a Bible verse and pray a prayer.  This is usually quite entertaining as the small child lighting the candle brings all the suspense and tension of a disaster movie and the verse and prayer is usually inaudible and guessing what is being said makes the imagination wander into areas best not brought into the sanctuary.  Advent always seemed, to me, to be made for children.  I've seen Advent calendars with little doors to open with candy treats inside.  It always looked like the countdown to Santa's arrival rather than the coming of the King.

I've discovered Advent reminds us to focus on the second coming of our King and reminds us to keep Jesus at the center of our lives.  I know this is something I need to do.  I've found myself at the center of my life for far too long, lately.

I've found an Advent app for my iPhone with a Bible study to guide me through Advent.  I hope to learn more about Advent.  I'd like to learn what the candles mean and why there is a pink candle.  I'd like to move Jesus into the center of my thoughts and my life and, certainly, my Christmas.  The first day begins with Simeon and Anna meeting the Holy family and witnessing a promise they each had waited every day to see fulfilled in their lifetimes.  I want my Advent season filled with the anticipation of the coming of Christ, at Christmas and at the second coming.  I hope to be able to share more of my discoveries with you as this ADVENTure in Advent unfolds.

Happy Advent.  Oh come, Emmanuel.

Linking with Em at Imperfect Prose.

Missional ideas for "stay at home" missionaries

This Christmas season I've been making an effort to focus outside myself and my family and focus on being intentional in making Christmas meaningful this year.  Most of the effort I've put forward in this endeavor, thus far, has cost me money and very little time.  I did the shoebox Christmas gifts and the Soldiers' Angels Christmas cards.  These really didn't involve too much of my time.  Today I'm focusing on being a Stay At Home missionary.  This will involve more of my time than my money.  I think it's a good thing.  This is what I want to do to change the way I feel about my relationship with Jesus and the way I relate to people outside of a relationship with Jesus.  Below are eight things we can do to treat our home towns and neighborhoods like the mission field they are.  Of course, this isn't just a Christmas mission.  But isn't Christmastime a wonderful time to start?

1.  Eat with people far from God.  People eat at least two times a day.  Try to find a person to share lunch with at least three times a week.

2.  Walk, don't drive.  If you live in a walkable area, make a practice of getting out and walking around your neighborhood.

3.  Be a regular.  Instead of hopping all over the city for gas, groceries, eating out, and coffee, go to the same places.

4.  Hobby with others.  Pick a hobby you can share.  Get out and do something you enjoy with others.  Try a city league sport.

5.  Talk to your co-workers.  How hard is that?  Take your breaks with intentionality.  Pick four co-workers and pray for them.  Just be nice.

6.  Volunteer for secular charities.  What do you care about?  Get involved and do it with people far from God.

7.  Participate in city events.  Don't just cocoon at home.  Go to fundraisers, festivals, clean-ups, summer shows, and concerts.

8.  Serve your neighbors.  Help a neighbor by weeding, mowing, building a cabinet, fixing a car.  Do ANYTHING to show you care.

Now dash away! Dash away! Dash away all!

And, we're off...

I feel it in my bones.  The anticipation of completing my Christmas checklist on time and getting it done just right.  It's funny, I pretty sure no one else in my family is feeling this same anxiety.  Just me.

I wonder how these traditions became ingrained in my head?  I have to have Christmas lights on the outside of the house, wreaths on all the windows, at least one decorated Christmas tree (but 2 or 3 trees would be better), decorate the house with assorted decorations and greenery, send out all the Christmas cards, bake the Christmas cookies, shop for the gifts, wrap the gifts, clean the house, invite friends to the house, make the Christmas dinner.  Did I miss anything?

I'm torn between wanting to make Christmas memorable by doing the Christmas traditions and making Christmas meaningful by doing things for others in the name of Jesus.  In the end, I'm feeling as if I've added more to my Christmas busyness than I've taken away from it.

I am a woman who is able to remove an article of clothing from her closet for each new article of clothing added to her closet.  I am a woman who is able to toss items left unused or unworn for one year, but, I can't seem to let go of any Christmas traditions.  I have friends who send New Year cards because doing Christmas cards is too time costly.  I know of people who do not put up a Christmas tree in their home or lights on their home, and yet, they still manage to call it Christmas.  I want to be one of those people.  How do they do it? 

I've written on this blog about wanting Christmas to be different this year.  I'm still working on it.  Today I am mailing off my Soldier Angel Christmas cards.  Somehow, I cannot let these Soldier Angel cards replace the cards I send to friends and family, but in my heart I think this would be the most appropriate thing to do to minimize Christmas busyness.  We sent off our shoebox Christmas gifts, but this will not replace the gifts we give each other in our family.  Although, I think they should because this would minimize our Christmas spending. 

Maybe the best idea for me would be to just do less.  This year I will give my son just one gift.  (not counting socks and underwear, because, well just because)  I'm hesitant to say I will give my husband only one gift, (mostly because he reads my blog and he may not be happy with this decision) but maybe just one gift would be OK this year.  As for me, I would like to receive the gift of an organized house this year.  Maybe this will help me have a more meaningful Christmas.

I'm trying to think of my next meaningful Christmas giving.  I would like to find an Angel Tree in the area.  I've seen these before and I like the idea behind them.  This mission is to give Christmas gifts to the children in the area who have a mother or father in prison.  There used to be a department store in our area that always had one of these Angel Trees.  It was in a part of town I don't usually visit.  I liked it because you could go in the store, take some cards off the tree, shop for the gifts written on the cards while you were in the store and then leave them under the tree.  It felt really right and I didn't mind the fact that it promoted shopping in that particular store.  Too bad this store isn't open anymore.  I'm going to have to go hunting for one like it.  I'll let you know how this works out for me. 
 
In the meantime, I will continue my attempts at minimizing my Christmas busyness and maximizing my Christmas purpose.  Wish me luck.

#ThankGod

I noticed that #ThankGod was trending on Twitter.  I thought I would take a few minutes to see what all the people thanking God were thanking God for.  I thought it would be fun.  I was surprised.  I was educated.  I am so happy there are so many people thanking God.

*Evidently many people use God as an alarm clock.  This was news to me, but check out a few of the tweets I found.

tpoydras_CBG 

First and foremost, gotta thank the man up above for waking me up this morning....#ThankGod

Smoke_FYT

#ThankGod for waking me yo this morning

 

LivingNDopeness 

#ThankGod For waking me up this morning

 

Nyiah5 

#ThankGOD for wakin me n mine

 

*And many people are grateful God makes the coffee.

 

xobrandinicole 

#ThankGod for Starbucks. I would be lost...well...more like asleep :)

 

kaitlynlacass kaitlynbrielle

Caramel latte # starbucksatschool #thankgod

 

*There are a lot of folks grateful for their jobs.  And they should be grateful.  Thanks, Obama.  The unemployment rate is AWESOME.

 

Buddy_Lee55 

#ThankGod for a new job!!!

 

QcKid4rmQueensz

I'm blessed ..I have more than one job a roof over my head n food on the table #ThankGOD 

 

PrinceMason 

I #ThankGOD tht I still hav my Good Health, LiFe, Family, Job, Truck & Im still n my Right Mind*

 

*Most of the tweeters are happy they have a break in classes, or they did well on a test, or they never have to take a particular course again.  As long as there are tests, there will always be prayer in school.  :) 

 

caseykowal  

3 classes to get through then i'm finally going home! #thankgod 

 

Chance_Jones 

Last day of school #thankgod 

 

*Some people are grateful to God for the short work week.  And not everyone is grateful for their jobs. 

 

sarahaadkins17  

last day of the work week #thankgod #ihatemyjob 

 

*There are plenty of people thanking God for all the physical blessings he as bestowed upon them. 

 

ImFlyAF  

I love my teeth. Pearly, straight & white. #thankgod

 

_InfamousBunnii Hii 

#ThankGod for the person That You made me.

 

GoodPuh_See

Your #tooshort to be my boyfriend. #ThankGod.

 

*Some of the tweeters were paying attention in Sunday School.  They know God is about second chances and faith and hope. 

 

wasupstew  

#ThankGod for 2nd chances! Where sould i be w/o the Lord's grace?

 

Mark_Ingram28 

Another morning, Another opportunity #thankGod #Amen 

 

HIGHDEFBeauty  

#ThankGod for EVERYTHING! The good the bad and all in between! without the Lord I am an empty shell!

 

BlakeWalker24 

I #ThankGod that even though times are tough, he will make sure we get through them as long as our faith is strong.

 

*Of course, there were many thanks to God for the really important things in life. 

 

AntjHart  

#ThankGod for candy and ice cream.

 

AntjHart 

#ThankGod for Netflix

 

ihotunem  

There's good network coverage here as well #ThankGod  

 

demimcpherson  

Moving back in with my mom. #thankgod

 

dmalamud

#thankgod I took a vacation day tomorrow

 

*And a few of the tweeters thanked God for being God and doing what God does

 

KnwItAll_Ash  

#ThankGod For Loving Me!!!!